


House of Horror

by MrProphet



Category: House M.D.
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-22
Updated: 2017-04-22
Packaged: 2018-10-22 16:48:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10701060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrProphet/pseuds/MrProphet





	House of Horror

House stood at the board, considering the symptoms. “Alright; we have a patient admitted with hyeractivity, hypertrichosis, elevated aggression levels and photosensitivity. Ideas, people?”

“Hyperthyroidism,” Chase suggested.

Foreman shook his head. “Hyperthyroidism would result in hypotrichosis,” he insisted.

“Do you have an idea?” Chase asked. “Or are you just going to shoot down other people’s?”

“It could be lupus,” Foreman suggested.

“It’s not lupus,” House snarled. “Lupus would explain the photosensitivity, but not the aggression. Cameron?”

“Lycanthropy,” Cameron suggested. “That would explain all of the symptoms.”

“But there’s no bite marks,” Foreman argued. “No claw wounds. What’s the vector?”

“Sexual transmission,” Chase offered.

“Does that even happen?” Cameron scoffed.

“Evidence is limited,” Wilson assured her. “Most of the werewolves who claim sexual transmission were also bitten or scratched.”

“Kinky,” House noted. “Also, scar tissue could be reduced if this isn’t a first transformation, just the first we’ve caught. Alright; other ideas?”

“Loup garou,” Chase offered. “An inherited condition.”

“Failed shamanic transformation?” Foreman said. “We can screen his blood for trace mycotoxins.”

“Satanic pact,” was Cameron’s final suggestion.

“Requires a wolfskin belt,” Wilson insisted. “The transformative effects would have stopped as soon as we got her into scrubs.”

“Alright,” House suggested. “Check for scars – old or new – get the family background to look for heredity and do the bloodwork.”

“What about ST?” Chase asked.

House shrugged. “Well; you could always have sex with her and see what happens at the next full moon. Meantime, start her on aconitine and silver nitrate.”

“But silver nitrate only works for lycanthropy,” Foreman argued. “If she doesn’t have lycanthropy they’ll poison her.”

“If her system has been subject to shamanic possession she’ll still have an elevated resistance, and if she gets sick we’ll have our cause long before it kills her.”

“And if it is a Satanic pact?”

“Then… she’s going to Hell.”


End file.
